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Satire

Report: Dad Thinks That’s an Easy Fix

Columbus, OH— Emerging, caked in sweat and grime, from the depths of his daughter’s Acura TL on Tuesday, local man Peter Ritter announced that this would be an easy fix. “At first I thought it might be an issue with the alternator, but it started just fine, so I started going down the list,” the

  • September 20, 2019
Report: Dad Thinks That’s an Easy Fix September 20, 2019
Satire

Local Hero Pitches Entire Softball Game With Beer in Hand

While playing a recreational game of softball during a family gathering out in Geneva, Illinois, 43-year-old Frank Gerlin managed to pitch the entire game with a fresh beer in his hand at all times. Gerlin, a father of two, gave up only one home run and consumed four beers over the course of the game,

  • September 17, 2019
Local Hero Pitches Entire Softball Game With Beer in Hand September 17, 2019
Satire

Fan “Definitely” Could Have Made That Field Goal

Shortly after his team’s kicker missed a 31-yard-field goal, 29-year-old local fan Jason Rambles confidently announced that he “definitely would have made that.” “No doubt about it, if you put me on that field, I’m making that kick,” Rambles told his friends and several nearby bar patrons. “Only 31 yards? That’s basically a gimme. What

  • September 17, 2019
Fan “Definitely” Could Have Made That Field Goal September 17, 2019
Satire

Guy At Driving Range Pretty Open About Intent To Nail Ball Collector

Winking Hills Country Club — Reports confirm that local man Glenn Dunlop is not messing around about pegging the ball collector at the driving range today. “I’ll get that little sucker,” Dunlop told his tee neighbor, Karen Le, as he let loose another lob towards the gas-powered golf cart far downrange. That ball’s arc terminated

  • September 9, 2019
Guy At Driving Range Pretty Open About Intent To Nail Ball Collector September 9, 2019
Satire

Man Refuses To Eat Vegetables Unless They’ve Been Grilled

According to multiple sources, Scottsdale, Arizona native Jonathan Brewer, 35, refuses to eat vegetables unless they have first been cooked on a charcoal grill. Brewer, who refuses to eat any salads or other vegetable side dishes, will, however, gladly eat corn, zucchini, or even romaine lettuce, assuming it has been grilled to the point of

  • August 31, 2019
Man Refuses To Eat Vegetables Unless They’ve Been Grilled August 31, 2019
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