Multiple reports out of Whitefish, Wisconsin indicate that Lance Binsky’s neighbor has recently purchased an electric lawn mower, much to the disgust of the 43-year-old resident. “I mean, an electric lawnmower? Can you believe it? It’s like he has no sense of pride at all,” Binsky was heard complaining. “Look at it, it’s got a
According to his teenage children, local dad Jonathan Sanders has recently been using the word “lit” in conversation at an alarming rate. This is proving to be doubly frustrating as it has become apparent that Sanders has absolutely know idea what the word means. “Hey kids, keeping it lit up today?” Sanders was recently heard
Just two beers into their monthly night hanging out at the local bar, a group of dads began talking about “how cool” it would be to “pull a heist.” “Obviously, we would never do it, but man, wouldn’t it be awesome to rob a bank? Or like a casino or something?” asked 45-year-old Jake Denton.
Lawrence, Kansas native Bill Benson isn’t worried about getting his wife a Valentine’s Day gift yet, as he believes the holiday is still weeks away. “I’ll worry about it over the weekend or maybe next week sometime,” he said Monday morning, not realizing he had less than four days to make up for last year’s
Ever since receiving a brand new Amazon Echo as a Christmas present, local man John Wogman, 31, has been deeply suspicious of the device, despite setting it up in his living room. “Yeah, I mean, I guess it’s pretty useful and stuff,” Wogman explained. “Like, it can tell me the weather outside, and set timers.