Satire

Local Dad Has Strong Opinions About New Chili’s Menu Items

Elliot Nathans, a 49-year-old father of three from Columbus, Ohio, has recently revealed that he has some “strong opinions” about the newer menu items at his local Chili’s Bar and Grill. “Listen, you know I love Chili’s,” Nathans told his family as well as the waitress at the Festival Center location of the tex-mex casual

Local Dad Has Strong Opinions About New Chili’s Menu Items
Satire

Man Tries To Impress Mechanic By Using The Word “Hemi”

Despite having a very limited knowledge of cars or engines, 33-year-old Jonathan Briarson has decided to try to impress his local mechanic by using the word “hemi” in reference to his 2015 Toyota Corolla. Briarson, who took in his lightly-used vehicle for a routine oil change, found himself waiting awkwardly in a room with his

Man Tries To Impress Mechanic By Using The Word “Hemi”
Satire

Local Man Convinced Lava Lamp In Bedroom “Still Cool”

Jonathan Strill, a 31-year-old resident of Aurora, Illinois, has recently gone on record that he is convinced the lava lamp in his bedroom will “totally become cool again” and that “it’s just a matter of time until this bad boy is the next new fad.” Strill, who has had the red lava lamp since winning

Local Man Convinced Lava Lamp In Bedroom “Still Cool”
Satire

Dad Still Has Nose, Reports Distraught 4-Year-Old Son

39-year-old father William Peterson has stolen the nose of his four-year-old son, Joshua, and refuses to give it back, a distraught Joshua reported to the press. According to the boy, the day started like any other before it quickly took a dark turn. While he was playing with his father, the paternal figure suddenly and

Dad Still Has Nose, Reports Distraught 4-Year-Old Son
Satire

Dad Spends First 3 Hours Of Saturday Walking Around In Tighty-Whities

Disgusted accounts are emerging from Athens, Georgia, that 44-year-old father of two William Sharp has thus far spent the first three hours of his Saturday walking around the house in nothing but a pair of white briefs, colloquially known as tighty-whities. “Ugh, dad, put on a shirt at least,” his 14-year-old son Tyler allegedly asked

Dad Spends First 3 Hours Of Saturday Walking Around In Tighty-Whities