Satire

Dad Absolutely Crushes College-Aged Son At Beer Pong

19-year-old college sophomore Chad Bennings expressed bewilderment after his 48-year-old father George “absolutely crushed” him during a game of beer pong played at a family barbecue. “That was insane, I’ve never seen anything like it,” a dazed Chad said in response to the shellacking that saw his father win before he even had a chance

Dad Absolutely Crushes College-Aged Son At Beer Pong
Satire

Kid Knows Dad Will Eventually Break And Do The Chores For Him

Bobby Benson continued to play Fortnite recently, confident that his dad would eventually clean up the overflowing trash can in the kitchen. “Oh, he’ll get angry and say stuff like ‘no allowance this week’ but at some point he’ll just take out the garbage and shovel the walk,” said the 12-year-old. “It’s like his need

Kid Knows Dad Will Eventually Break And Do The Chores For Him
Satire

Local Man Drops Everything To Watch Cable Showing Of Bloodsport

A productive Saturday afternoon was ruined when 34-year-old William Charles saw that the Jean-Claude Van Damme film Bloodsport was playing on TBS. While he was only planning on watching some TV while eating lunch, when he saw that the 1988 martial arts film had just begun, he resigned himself to spending most of the day watching

Local Man Drops Everything To Watch Cable Showing Of Bloodsport
Satire

“Did They Have To Find The Cow?” Asks Customer Hated By Waitress

Donald Freeland, a customer at a local bistro, has been overheard sarcastically asking the waitstaff if “they had to find the cow” after waiting 15 minutes for his steak, solidifying his position as being the most hated patron in the restaurant by the entire staff. “Did you have to slaughter it, too? Ha ha, get

“Did They Have To Find The Cow?” Asks Customer Hated By Waitress
Satire

Local Dad Already Preparing To Forget Valentine’s Day

With Valentine’s Day a little over a month away, local dad Gary Andrews is making sure to proactively begin preparations to totally forget about it. Andrews apparently plans to get a head start on totally blanking about Valentine’s Day until it’s far too late, after several years of waiting until the last minute to do

Local Dad Already Preparing To Forget Valentine’s Day