The Top 7 Times Dad Needs A Beer

March 4, 2017

In the immortal words of Homer Simpson, “Beer. The cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.” And no one embodies that motto more than dad. Dads love beer, but there are some occasions where a beer isn’t just a treat. It’s a necessity.

Here are the seven moments when dad absolutely has to have a beer.

7) At A Family Reunion

Family Reunions are exhausting for everyone involved, but especially dads. Beer is literally the most important item on the shopping list, just above burgers and well above “whatever ingredients Aunt Gladys needs for her potato salad.”

6) While Fishing

Who even goes fishing without a cooler full of beer? Like, what would be the point? Actually catching fish?

5) When The Grill Has Been Fired Up

Once the grill’s been fired up, one hand is going to be holding onto tongs, but if there’s not a beer in a dad’s spare hand…what’s he supposed to do with that hand? It’s just unnatural.

4) When He Stumbles Across His Kid’s Instagram Page

Nothing is more terrifying to a dad than finding out what his children are doing on social media. Especially if there are filters. And God forbid if there’s a duck face in any of them. This might call for something stronger than beer, honestly.

3) When He Gets Home From Work

Ahh, there’s nothing more relaxing for a dad than coming back from a hard day’s work to crack open a beer and get ready to make some prime dad jokes at the dinner table.

2) When the Game’s On

Listen, it’s not that your dad really loves cracking open a beer and sitting on his recliner to watch the big game, it’s that he needs to. Otherwise, we might lose. It’s a little thing called a good luck beer, just don’t tell your mother.

1) The Night Of His Daughter’s Prom

By far, the one time when a dad needs a beer more than any other is the day he sends his daughter off to prom. He needs more than a beer. He needs more than two beers. He’s going to clear the house of any beers, and then make a beer run, because he is not going to stay up thinking about how late his daughter is out and what might be happening. Nope. Not gonna do it. No sir. Not going there. Hand him another beer while you’re at it, he really needs it.