Dad’s Favorite Snacks (Some Of Them, Anyway)

July 31, 2018

Snacks! We all love and need them for a quick burst of between-meal energy, especially dad.

And we now live in the age of the super fancy foo-foo snack. Designer donuts. Monster mountain-sized cupcakes covered in strange, wonderful sprinkles in flavors the pilgrims never could have imagined when they landed on Plymouth Rock.

And these snack-meals are fine if you have the time, but dad has work to do, so he needs a good, quick snack to power his core reactor. He can’t be weighted down with the 1,500 or so calories these confections contain.

So here they are, in no particular order, dad’s favorite snacks:

1 – Candy bar. Sure, some can make the case for eating one of those healthy energy bars, but now that sports gambling is going to be legal throughout the land the Vegas line is out:
Favorite Underdog
Candy bar – 19.5 Energy bar
2 – Pitted prunes. Might as well get used to these things, for dad health down the line.
3 – Beef Jerky. If there was a flavor country, beef jerky would be served on silver platters by waiters dressed as Paul Bunyan at the border entrance to greet visitors.
4 – Midnight snack. Occasionally, sleep eludes even the hardest working dad, time for trip to the fridge for whatever might be available. Dad’s unique physiological make-up & constitution allows him to synthesize any food consumed during the night into a sleep aid.
5 – Chex Mix. This salty grab bag of goodness plays all the hits, from pretzels to mixed nuts. Old school for sure but dad’s an old fool (1000 bonus frequent dad miles if you make them from scratch).
6 – Not trail mix. What is this? Bark? Dad hikes the trail, he doesn’t eat it.
7 – A pint of ice cream. The best things come in pints, ice cream and beer. Beer cream float? Dad would not say no to this.