Zima Is Back — Will Your Dad Drink It?

June 29, 2017

In a move aimed at all the 90s nostalgia seekers out there, MillerCoors has decided, for a limited time, to bring back the perpetual punchline, Zima, to the market. The clear, alcoholic, fruity-flavored malt beverage will be on shelves through Labor Day, which of course leads us to ponder a very important question.

Will dads drink it?

On one hand, it’s alcohol and it’s from the past, so that puts it in favor of dads consuming it. But on the other, it is sweet, tastes…odd to many, and might be considered more “girly” to dads. So that would be some points against.

Before we decide, let’s take a look at the history of Zima. It was released in 1993 as a lower-alcohol alternative to wine coolers, and sold 1.2 million barrels in 1994. But the sales soon dropped precipitously, as the drink was marketed towards young men, but was generally seen as an “unmanly” beverage. Somehow, Zima stayed in production in the United States until 2008 (and it still can be seen in Japan), but the last 9 years have been Zima-less for Americans and, more importantly, American dads.

So will dads drink it?

Of course they will. Because at this point, drinking a Zima is basically the alcoholic equivalent of a dad joke. Dads will buy it, because it’s “hilarious” and then they will drink it, because it’s “hilarious.” So yes, your dad will totally be drinking Zimas this summer. Congratulations?

P.S. Get those jolly ranchers ready!