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Showering Dad Overheard Loudly Singing “All Star” By Smash Mouth

Multiple family members and a few neighbors overheard local father-of-three, Sean Pallmore, loudly singing the 1999 Smash Mouth hit single, “All Star” in the shower, despite him clearly not knowing all the lyrics. “He started with the whole, ‘Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me’ section without any difficulty,” Pallmore’s 16-year-old son

Showering Dad Overheard Loudly Singing “All Star” By Smash Mouth
Satire

Local Dad Inconsolable After Losing $10 Pair Of Sunglasses

Tragedy has struck the Rogers household, as reports have surfaced that 48-year-old Andrew Rogers has lost his “go to” sunglasses that he purchased four years ago at a Citgo gas station just outside of Akron, Ohio. Sources say Rogers is “inconsolable” due to the loss, and has brought up the lost sunglasses to his family

Local Dad Inconsolable After Losing $10 Pair Of Sunglasses
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Dad Can Explain Why He Needs To Own 4 Different Hammers

According to family members, Mark Brians of Dayton, Ohio, has and uses four different hammers for his house projects. While no one quite understands why he needs so many hammers, Brians insists that he “can explain” the reason for owning so many hammers, including two that are the exact make and model. “Listen, different hammers

Dad Can Explain Why He Needs To Own 4 Different Hammers
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Overworked Dad Only Manages To Get 3 Naps In Over Weekend

Citing a “crazy-busy schedule,” Richard Aaronson, a 47-year-old father of three from Davenport, Iowa, only managed to get three naps in last weekend. “I mean, I managed to get my Friday post-work nap in,” a clearly exhausted Aaronson told reporters. “But after that? I only was able to fit in a quick power nap on

Overworked Dad Only Manages To Get 3 Naps In Over Weekend
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Local Man Plays 62nd Consecutive Round Of Terrible Golf

Chuck Benson recently extended his 5-year streak of horrible golf when he shot a 124 at the local course, marking the 62nd consecutive round he has performed poorly dating back to 2013. “It was just 8, 12, 13 and the last few holes,” Benson complained. “Other than that I was close to par, damnit!” Benson,

Local Man Plays 62nd Consecutive Round Of Terrible Golf