Dad’s Farmer’s Tan Going to Be Pretty Epic This Year

June 10, 2018

According to sources familiar with the situation, Richard Benson, a 43-year-old father-of-two from Tallahassee, is on pace to have a “pretty epic” farmer’s tan by the end of the summer. Benson, who has been doing a lot of gardening and lawn work this spring, appears to already have a mid-August level of farmer’s tan, with a completely pale torso and a dark beige neck and forearms.

Benson is well-known for his impressive ability to tan while not really going to the beach and taking his shirt off, but this year might be his most impressive farmer’s tan yet, beating out 2010, when Benson actually stuck with his resolution to go running outside three times a week.