Winking Hills Country Club — Reports confirm that local man Glenn Dunlop is not messing around about pegging the ball collector at the driving range today.
“I’ll get that little sucker,” Dunlop told his tee neighbor, Karen Le, as he let loose another lob towards the gas-powered golf cart far downrange. That ball’s arc terminated in a dissatisfying thud 60 yards off-target.
“He’s here at least once a week,” Le later told reporters. “I mean, we all send a couple of shots in that direction, sure, when we get frustrated or when we’re just trying to have a laugh. But Glenn, it seems like beaning that underpaid teenager is the only reason he even comes out.”
Malice glinted in Dunlop’s eyes as he reared back for another go at the ballboy. However, some excess movement of the head pushed the ball a good 30 yards astray.
When asked for comment, teenage ball collector PJ Wermund admitted he was aware of Dunlop’s intentions.
“Look, man, this is just a summer job and I know it’ll be over soon, but yeah, I do see him up there every week, trying to take a shot at me. Why do you think we put this cage up over the door?”
While disturbed, local onlookers did concede that Dunlop’s handicap had significantly improved since needlessly taking aim at the young man.