Man Wonders Why Son Knows So Much About LSD

June 1, 2019

After what he’d thought would be a low-key conversation about marijuana legalization, local man Dan Simpson was unsettled to find that his son actually knows a lot about LSD.

“I mean, a lot. He talked about it for five straight minutes,” the 55-year-old father told reporters.

“I always figured he’d drink and try weed. I did a lot of that myself in college and turned out fine. But, man, that other stuff can really mess ya up!”

Reports indicate that Simpson’s 20-year-old son stopped short of saying he’d taken the drug, but had lots to say about its benefits.

“He kept saying things like, ‘the stigma is undeserved,’ and talking about ‘self-discovery’ and all that, and boy, I just don’t know.”

Simpson reportedly became more disturbed when his son later asked to borrow a King Crimson album.