Local Dad Still Can’t Pronounce ‘Chipotle’

March 22, 2019

Despite having eaten there at least once a month for the past eight years, local dad Jared Andrews, 53, is still unable to correctly pronounce the name of the fast casual eatery, Chipotle. “Oh yeah, I love Chip-attle,” Andrews was overheard recently as his nearby children visibly cringed.

“It’s just so frustrating,” vented his oldest son, Connor. “Like, we keep correcting him on it, and he still can’t get it right. He doesn’t even pronounce it wrong the same way each time! It’s driving us all crazy!”

To date, Andrews has never once correctly pronounced the name of the chain, instead calling it Chip-olle, Chip-totally, Chip-Old-Tea, and, perhaps worst of all, Chip-all-all-tay. Despite his inability to say the name correctly, he does assert that it is his favorite burrito place, even though he does like the queso at “Key-Dough-Bay.”