Local Dad Goes On Diet, Switching To Light Beer

May 22, 2018

Mike Shremp, a 48-year-old father of three, has announced that for the following few weeks, he will be going on a diet. His diet, which he calls the “Dad Diet,” involves eating the same foods, and spending the same amount of time on the recliner. In fact, the only calorie-cutting measure Shremp aims to take involves switching from Budweiser to Bud Light for the duration of the diet.

“Yeah, I figure I could shed a few pounds,” Shremp told reporters. “And considering how many calories I cut back on with this Bud Light, and how many Buds I normally toss back any given week, this should do the trick.”

Shremp has pointed out that he also plans on exercising to go along with his diet, though his exercise routine consists primarily of mowing the lawn several times a week. As many critics have pointed out, however, Shremp owns a riding lawn mower.