Local Dad Concerned By Rise In Funny Business Among Teens
Torrance, Calif. – Area father, Lyle Collins, 47, is being vocal in his concerns over what he fears is a rise in misbehavior among teens.
“I literally check in on them all the time,” Collins said. “Whether my daughter is hanging out with her girl friends or a few boys, I can’t help but suspect there’s some funny business going on in there.”
Collins asserts he knows that kids will be kids, and that they will have to make their own mistakes and deal with the consequences, but is confident there is something more happening. He was, however, unable to find any evidence to support his claims of funny business, claiming he can simply, “feel it in his bones.” He was not able to pinpoint any specific activities that would constitute funny business, either.
“Look,” Collins said, “I was a teen too. I get it. But there’s no way I was pulling the type of shenanigans that my daughter and her friends are pulling.”
Collins’ daughter, Sarah, 17, voiced her growing frustrations on her dad’s suspicions regarding her and her friends’ behavior. She cited most specifically that her dad was “ruining her life.”
“He literally checks in on us every 5 minutes,” the younger Collins complained. “He tries to cover up saying, ‘Oh, you guys want some snacks?’ or ‘Hey did you guys see that Jeopardy is on?’ Like, first of all, dad, no one cares about that dumb show. Second, how am I supposed to make out with my boyfriend if we are eating Bagel Bites or pizza rolls?”
Sarah’s boyfriend, Nick Jones, 17, had no comment on the alleged funny business, but did offer some insight on the situation in regards to Mr. Collins’ behavior.
“Yeah, it gets a little annoying,” Jones said. “Like, why does Sarah never want to eat the snacks her dad is offering? Bagel Bites are so bomb but she’s always just yelling at her dad saying things like, ‘No! Go away! You’re so annoying!’ I don’t know man, it just doesn’t make sense.”
Sarah’s father did acknowledge the difficulties of parenting adolescents compared to younger children.
“This isn’t like elementary school, you don’t know who these kids are,” Collins continued. “I don’t get to meet their parents and make a unfounded judgment on them and their child’s character before they hang out with my little girl.”
Collins has no set plan to combat this alleged rise in funny business, but has not ruled out live microphones and hidden cameras placed throughout his home.
Collins had few words to offer on his 14-year-old son, Mark. “Oh, he’s just my little champ. I know he’d never do anything to upset me. I do wish he’d hang out with the family more, though. Ever since we got him that iPad he’s been a shut-in, locks himself in his room all alone.”
Mark Collins could not be reached for comment by time of publication.